Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize