you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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