I bet he comes in French.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
