I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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