if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
try to milk me bitch
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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