Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
