So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize
