Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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