She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
