i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
false alarm, still single
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