Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
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