perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
