I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
