new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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