We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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