he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
my liver is dry heaving
I said "one day" and that day is not today
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
