How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
