Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
