There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
