Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
