clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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