I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
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