eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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