can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
