i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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