I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Randomize
