i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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