Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
So much rum. So many feels.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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