I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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