You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
