Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
You left your phone here
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