So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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