id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
