perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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