Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
