he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize