Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
