That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
