shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
