I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
