Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Randomize
