glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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