im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Sober January is a disaster.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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