Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
