You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Randomize
