hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
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