She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
