if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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