This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
