How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Randomize
